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COLLEGE PARK, MARYLAND– UMD has recently announced a new construction project that will see the replacement of McKeldin Mall with a new parking lot. This project aims to fix the recent parking overflow problems occurring in lots across campus, such as Lot 19. The new lot, called lot McK, is now a hotly debated topic, with student and faculty opinions split in several directions.

“This is just like what my failure of a son, Junior, was planning to do with my museum! In all honesty, I think anyone who’s ever given out a parking ticket is a disappointment to their parents,” said Curious George (2006) character Mr. Bloomsberry. 

“Did someone say parking lots? What a lucrative idea! We could sell so many more student parking permits by replacing McKeldin Mall with a parking lot! Who needs green spaces anyway?” added Curious George (2006) character Junior.

“Well, I just think seeing something green once in a while is nice, even if lawn grass is not a native plant and harms the local environment,” admitted Curious George (2006) character Maggie.

“This will certainly cause some issues with increased flooding with the reduced amount of soil to absorb rainwater. Perhaps we could design a new type of parking lot that doesn’t cause significant surface runoff,” suggested Curious George (2006) character Clovis.

“I hate to agree with a British Museum apologist,” lamented Curious George (2006) character The Man with the Yellow Hat, “but Mr. Bloomsberry is right. These green spaces are extremely important! How can we expect students to be excited to learn if all they ever see is varying shades of brick and concrete?”

“Ooh ooh ah ah!” shouted Curious George (2006) character Curious George.